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Friday, October 15, 2004

Or Is Gawking Baulking

What responsibility does a player have towards the performance of an umpire ? What role does he play in the febrile imagination of an overworked referee ? What determines the extent of his acceptance or rejection of the latter’s authority ? Is it a function of credibility, power , hierarchy ?

Such queries have been posed and answered soon after as many as three batsmen decided to walk, against the better judgement of the renowned umpires. Gllly has done this before and may have even been expected to, but Kasprowicz & Yuvi were not. This time, the media has opined that such acts of listening to the “ inner voice” has gone beyond the acme of sporting chivalry, to the stratosphere of officious engaging with work far outside one’s field of vision.

What constitutes “ walking “ ?
Well, simply put, using the ambulatory route to reach the cool confines of the pavilion, put your feet up and relax.
Right ! But when do you walk ? ( In cricket, please—Footballers have to run J ) When you are Out, Silly !
Alright, and when do you know you are out ?
When your stumps resemble the ruins of Hampi, when the fielder turns cartwheels after catching you, and so on..
Or when the umpire raises his index finger
What if the umpire doesn’t declare you out ? Do you have the right to declare yourself out ?
I don’t know, but it can be done.
When you walk even when the umpire doesn’t declare you out, does he call you back as you rush away ?
No, because I have myself upheld the finest traditions of the game , and ….
Pipe down, pipe down—why do you think the umpire didn’t give you out ?
Cos’ he didn’t think so.
Then, why did you walk ?Because something in me …….. ( Ed: Wants to bring world peace by working with underprivileged children.. )
Hey, I’m asking you -- Who asked you to walk ?
But I thought ….

Sporting pressures are many. Yet, some sportsmen continue to eschew momentary success. Why do they do so ? A sweet mystery of Life….


(Overheard on the Bus from the Lounge to the Bombay Craft at the airport )

Attendant : Any passengers to Ahmedabad ?

Somnolent Passenger: ( coming out of his reverie, like a waking bear after hibernation) : Huh ?

Attendant : Any passengers to Ahmedabad ?

S.P : ( loudly—stridency shines ) :Is the plane going to Ahmedabad ?

A: ( confused, and looking hither thither ) : Uhhh, No !

S.P : ( even more loudly ) : Then why are you asking if the plane is going to Ahmedabad ?
A : Cos’ Sir, I just wanted to check if ….

S. P : Do you always ask such questions ?

A: Er, no, ……. Er, yes !

S.P : I cannot understand why you are asking if the plane is going to Ahmedabad if it is going to Bombay .

A ( sheepishly) : Are all passengers to Delhi, Sir ? OK, fine, thank you, Sir
( makes a frenzied exit shaking his head )


S P ( to co-passenger) : This happened for the first time , very strange attendant , no ?

Co-Passenger ( perplexed) : Er,,.. er…

Almost swooned when the Display proudly showed Flight XXX to Bombay boarding at Terminal Y .
Bombay , BOMBAY ? ???
Are we back to pre-SS days already ?
Happy Days are Here again !!!Hurrah !!

Good Deed of the Day
Mid-day reported that a bunch of thieves decamped with over 4 tonnes of chocolate ( worth a few quid too ) in Skelmersdale, England.
At least someone has their priorities right.!!


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